


Soulsick

by JackandMarkaremySunandStars (ImagineBeingSafe)



Series: Soul Bound [1]
Category: Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, F/M, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Illnesses, Lovesickness, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, Soulmates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-12
Updated: 2019-01-12
Packaged: 2019-10-09 00:48:48
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,386
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17396933
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ImagineBeingSafe/pseuds/JackandMarkaremySunandStars
Summary: The consequences of not telling someone about your Soulmark are severe.they can include nausea, stomach pain, weakness, hemorrhage, lower body temperature.at it's most severe, it leads to seizures and death.Sean loves someone else. so how could you hurt him by telling him that you've developed  His Soulmark's twin?





	Soulsick

**Author's Note:**

> I don't do real relationships, so Rachel is a placeholder name. sorry if it's yours!
> 
> This is, as ever an AU.

You'd loved him for forever. He's your best friend. The feelings changed without you keeping up, for what is love but friendship set on fire?

 

But he was happy with Rachel, and you believed you would have proof by now if you were meant to be with him.

 

He'd had his Soulmark when you'd met- a stunning emerald green feather on the inside of his arm.

 

All you'd ever had was a bruise-colored smudge- the calling card of someone waiting for their own Soulmark.

 

One day, he calls you:

 

"I have to tell someone. I'm going to marry Rachel!"

 

You swallow the pain down and make your voice happy. To make him happy.

 

"That's wonderful, Sean!"

 

Two days later, the twin to Sean's feather appears on the inside of your left arm, where the smudge had been.

 

And you don't tell him.

 

You'd heard of bad things happening with Soulmarks- of couples with one killing the other because of the Soulmark changing and others about what happens when a Soulmark fades.

 

Your mother was proof of that, your father's faded, and he left- and she never recovered, dying when you were a teenager.

 

 

That's what you wait for. For you assume it will fade. That it's just there because you cannot have him.

 

You see it, and you can't breathe. Showers happen more often as if the hot water will wash it away.

 

But still you go on.

 

A few weeks later you get another call:

 

"Rachel got a call from the registry. They found her match. She's going to meet them. I think-

 

I think we're over."

 

And you don't shout for joy. Your heart _breaks_ for him. 

 

So you suck up your own hurt, invite him over for pizza, ice cream, and a Marvel movie marathon.

 

It's the best and worse night you've had in months.

 

Because he's right beside you.  Your throat burns with the need to tell him. You ache to hold him

 

But tonight is not about you.

 

So you settle next to him, watch movies that you both adore, and cater to his every whim.

 

Partway through Guardians of the Galaxy-

 

-he's already grabbed your hand because Little Peter and his mom always makes you tear up-

 

 -He wraps an arm around you and pulls you close.

 

You settle into his warmth in bliss.

 

He falls asleep after GOTG vol 2.  Sleep is for the weak!- not counting when you're hurting.

 

You let him sleep on your couch that night, covering him with the fluffiest blanket you own and putting a pillow under his head.

 

There is a sweet note left for you in the morning, and you smile because it worked.

 

+

Being without him is taking its toll. Oh, you text every night. You can't give that up. But seeing each other? Not happening.

+

 

You can't keep warm.  So it's lots of soaking, hot as you can stand them baths.

 

Getting out of one, burning pain shoots from your neck, down your spine, all the way to your toes.

 

Gasping, you take a step and your legs give out. You are left on the floor, struggling to breathe as the pain grips you tightly. It stops, eventually.

 

 

You talk to him one night, and he swears up and down he's going to come and spend time with you, another movie marathon, maybe?

 

Coughing is the new thing. It interrupted this call. He's so worried. But you lie, and it works.

 

"Just something I gotta get over."

 

Ok, not a real lie. But the meaning is different. He thinks a virus.

 

"Please take care of yourself, Y/N."

 

After the call, you have another coughing fit that sets your chest on fire. You've covered your mouth

and you feel something wet and warm spread over your hands. You lower them to find them covered in crimson. Blood.

 

You groan minutely and grab tissues from the box by your bed, wiping away the blood from your hands and patting your lips. You lay still, trying to breathe.

 

Anything you ate was met with sickness and vomiting when you even bothered to try eating at all.

 

Your stomach ached, and you were using a heat pack, to stop the pain and keep warm most of the time.

 

Then you stopped answering his calls, thinking you'd make it up to him after the mark faded.

 

Curled around the dark green sea turtle that also functioned as a heat pack, you clawed at the Mark.

 

Your phone started to buzz. You turned it off, tossing it lightly, so it ended up on the bed.

 

You can't

 

+Sean's POV+

 

She won't answer my calls, her voicemail box is full. I don't know what's going on, but I'm headed over there today.

 

She gave me a key, stating that if the worse ever happened, I was the only one she trusted with her things.

 

If something's wrong- I need to try to help her. She'd help me- has helped me. This last month or so-

 

I don't know what I'd have done without her support.

 

Losing Rachel about killed me. But Y/N- she's been a rock.

 

I let myself in, calling her name. the apartment is entirely too quiet. Usually, she has some form of noise, music, Netflix, YouTube, something.

 

 

"Y/N?"

 

I call out. More silence. Something's wrong. It feels like a horror game. Something awful has happened.

 

 

Slightly panicked, I call her name again.

 

I head to her bedroom. If she's not there-

 

Thankfully, she is. But she looks so wrong. Curled up, fetal, around the sea turtle she'd given me once when I was sore. Hair limp, pale, bags under her eyes. I'm sure she's lost weight, too.

 

She shifts in her sleep. And I see it- the smudge that marked her as Undecided has turned to a Soulmark.

 

It's- It's…

 

…The match to mine!

 

When did that happen?!

 

It looks like she's tried to tear it off, it's scraped to hell, and inflamed.

 

I do the only thing I can think of. I go to the free side of the bed, and carefully climb in.

 

 

+

You woke up the moment he climbed on the bed.

 

Your sleep was fitful at best, you were freezing again, the turtle only a lukewarm weight on your belly.  You were confused.

 

Then Sean’s arms wrapped around you from behind, and you flinched. Badly. Lungs burning, skin hypersensitive to his touch.

 

 Panic bursting through you, you tried to pull away, but Sean only pulled you in closer, wrapped you up completely in his embrace and pressed a kiss to the back of your neck.

 

" _Shite_ , you're freezing! It's only me, Y/N. Why are you-

 

Why didn't you tell me!?"

 

You still want to fight it, as unbelievable as that sounds. But, _ohh_ \- How warm he is!

 

He's not angry like you'd been sure of. Anger wouldn't leave him holding you as tight as he can.

 

You are so confused. Still tired too. Cold.  Really cold.

 

Sean kisses you once more, and lets go of you. He grabs the turtle and steps out of your room.

 

A few moments later, he tucks a blessedly warm turtle against your belly.

 

He slides back onto the bed, wraps around you again, you are in a cocoon of warmth.

 

"Wait. Don't fall asleep yet. I know you need it, but-

 

He grabs a bottle of water from the bedside table. He gently settles you into a position so you won't choke. It's a pull-top, so drinking will be easy.

 

"The whole thing if you can, Y/N. Please?"

 

You nod. Then promptly almost drop it on your face.

 

Sean grabbed the bottle. A soft sigh leaves him, and he holds the bottle so you can drink.

 

"We really need to talk about this…

 

I saw the feather.

 

"You've been Love-sick. It could have killed you. And you suffered- because you wanted me happy.

 

I love you so much, Y/N.

 

I'm so, so sorry you spent so much time and pain on me. That you felt you couldn't tell me"

 

I love you, I'm here, and it will be alright."

 

You relaxed. You had everything you needed right here.

 

Everything would be different now, but better. Happier

 

You'd accepted the other side of you, and he loved you back.


End file.
